Today's Truths

• Shoals at FreeDarko has an almost indescribably fantastic post about, more or less, basketball as a metaphor for finding meaning in an essentially anonymity inducing consumer culture. Relatedly, I mourn for Francisco Liriano by demonstrating that (shameless) imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
  

• Barack Obama... I mean this is 6 kinds of awesome, and really, for me, this is about 150 kinds of kick-ass. But since we here at WAP are all about substance over style (except when we aren't) how much of this is playing the Saxophone on Arsenio? I just don't know enough to get excited about him for any reasons aside from A) he ain't Hillary, and relatedly B) he might win, even against John (St.) McCain. Now, talk to me about Gore-Obama '08, and I'm ready with the bumper space.
  

• KFMonkey drops the hammer on the third season of Lost _boom. I don't really have anything to add other than to call bullshit on the show's creators any and every time they claim to "know where they are going" with the whole story of the island. If they're just making stuff up at this point, I'll start a fund so that we can get better, uhm, stuff to the writers' room, and we can go full-on David Lynch on this piece.
  

• I am boring (ht: Lance:

How evil are you?

• A tailer-made description of why I keep saying (in comments) that basketball is not-especially amenable to SABR-geekdom from today's Daily Dime:

  
  

  You may never see a highlight of this play, as it did not result in a bucket or dunk, but follow this to get a glimpse of the kinds of things that happen in an NBA game on a nightly basis:

  Deron Williams beats a show by Dirk Nowitzki on a ball screen, drives middle and makes a sweet no-look pass to Carlos Boozer. Boozer, challenged by a good shot-blocker in DeSagana Diop, loses the ball on his way up, sending the ball high into the air. Williams, on the baseline following his pass, jumps high to keep the ball away from Anthony Johnson, who otherwise would have an easy recovery, and bats the ball toward the free-throw line.

  Boozer, Diop, and Devean George all make an effort to get a hand on the ball, but it ultimately goes to Andrei Kirilenko. AK-47 takes an immediate dribble toward the rim and Diop, who gets back into defensive position. Andrei bends his long 6-9 frame down to almost half his size and throws a perfect bounce pass, thru Diop's legs, to a waiting Jarron Collins under the basket.

  As Collins goes up for the layup, Diop reacts quickly and blocks Collins point blank at the rim.

  The entire play takes nine seconds and produces two missed shots, a good hustle play by four players, two terrific passes, and a blocked shot. And no points. Oh, and three verbalized "wow" calls by me as it happened. Highlights alone do not tell the NBA story.

  Nor do the stats as we collect them.

That's all for now. Theo, get it done, or JoBu is coming to get you:

Pooh's Views of Early Fall TV: The Good

So far the new shows I've decided to watch have been a bit underwhelming We've seen the debuts of several new shows, and I've taken a gander at several of them: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip; Smith; Shark; Six Degrees and SHeroes. By and large, meh. Today I'll talk about the ones which I have liked so far, later, I'll get into the bad and the unoriginal.

1. "Heroes" - okay, so they are so obviously going for the X-Men storyline to appeal to the immense fanboi base. So what? I'm something of a fanboi myself, so it works for me. Plus, they've made several good choices - only one of the players introduced thus far has the Supermannish whiny-guy thing going, and they have made some very interesting choices not just for powers but for who has them. I particularly liked the inclusion of the Japanese salaryman, as well as the flying brothers.

Additionally, they are aiming more for Darknight era Batman, rather than Adam West. I'll take dark and mysterious over campy pretty much any day. One downside is I'm not convinced that either female lead is up to carrying the show. Well, I'm convinced that Ali Larter isn't, and I don't recognize the girl playing the cheerleader, so I'm, at best, skeptical. A further negative is that they appear to have picked the Most Annoying. Voice. Ever. to do the "previously on 'Heroes'" bit: B+

(However, Kung Fu Monkey has a good point about the dialogue, which is at times...pretentiously portentious:

he first episode was laden with the particular disease of non-genre guys writing genre: "Behoooold. I bring you superheroes WITHOUT CAPES! What brave new world of fiction is this? And look, there's even a plotline using a series of pictures as a narrative device. They are called, in the underground, 'co-mic book-es.'"

Indeed.)

2. "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip" - Profoundly disappointing pilot episode. Not saying it was bad, but compare it to the pilot for "West Wing." Maybe for those who never watched "Sports Night", the show might seem original, but I feel like Sorkin is covering old ground with 30 minutes more per week to use. Matt Perry and Brad Whitford seem to have a nice reparte, but I'm concerned that they are not distinct enough from each other either in appearance or personna. I could be proven wrong, but who wants to watch "Smart and Smarter?" I did enjoy the opening teaser (and especially enjoyed the dig at the Media for all reporting the "Network" aspect of it, as if it was an original observation.)

Lest I seem too negative, I thought the second and third episodes were better - a lot will ride on Sarah Paulson, who didn't have much to do in the pilot, but has certainly been growing on me. She'll always be compared to Allison Janney's C.J. Cregg. High bar there. Additionally, I don't feel like we 'know' any of the characters besides Matt & Danny so far - what is D.L. Hughley supposed to be doing? (And after ignoring the 15-year old looking groupie in almost perfunctory fashion, what odds on their being a shocking twist regarding alternate sexuality?) Is Nate Corddry (of "Daily Show" moderate fame) playing Topher Grace playing Jimmy Fallon? Will Danny Concannon, er Tim Busfield ever stop inducing "hey it's C.J.'s hubby! What the hell happened to his beard?" reactions. I know, I know, it's early, but my expectations were pegged insanely high.

But despite all my complaints, it's Aaron freaking Sorkin writing the dialogue, and Matt Perry and Brad Whitford can still in fact bring it: B

(Slate disagrees with my last point, writing the show off as an excercise in "I'm Aaron Sorkin_bitch!, and you're not")

3. "Friday Night Lights" - There was not a single original element in the pilot episode. Isn’t there a rule against a director of a film (Peter Berg) turning around and directing a TV show of the same title? It’s supposed to work the other way, right? (See Miami Vice, Firefly/Serenity, etc…) To my recollection, Altman had nothing to do with MASH the series, for an example of a movie being made into a show.

So, let's see, take the basic plot line of "Varsity Blues," remove the MTV-related goofiness. Mix in the hyperkinetic, shaky camera work from "The Shield," and in the soundtrack from "Any Given Sunday" because it works well for football. Add insanely violent football action, plus the Standard Miracle Comeback ("SMC"). (Simmons has a point:

I can't stomach another climactic game scene in which the home team recovers an onside kick, runs the next play for 20 yards, then, on the final play, the QB throws a 50-yard pass that his WR catches on the opposing 30 and takes off for the winning TD. Not even the CFL has 140-yard football fields. Come on. This isn't rocket science.

I know, didn't occur to me at the time either, but yeah.)

All that said, it was still amazingly well done for network TV, and fully watchable. Even knowing what was going to happen the SMC still had chill potential. Even if the throw should have gone 30 yards out the back of the endzone unless Deer-in-headlights backup QB guy took at 23-step drop before throwing...The trash-talking rapper/preacher running back was surprisingly effective as well - in his prayer following the game, his cadence reminded me uncannily of that of my former college roomie who's now a pastor.

The challenge now is to make the show interesting and believable across a whole season. How many SMC's can we really believe in? And will the show be able to maintain the almost painful earnestness, or will it be reduced to what Tall Guy predicted: "The OC" in pads? B-

I am most intrigued by "The Nine" - after the disappointing premiere of "Lost" (by adding more and more stuff to the island, they are in danger of neutering the essential "Lost"-ness of the whole deserted island thing. More on this one next week, I promise). The pilot teased, and now we really want to know "What happened inside the bank?" Unfortunately, I'm guessing from the previews of the second episode that it is going to be told, in a piecemeal, flashback manner. The premise is "Lost" inverted. And I'm not sure that's a good thing - the backstories make the island happening more interesting, I'm not sure how much I'll care about What Happened After to the Nine until I know What Happened Before. Of course, I could be wrong, and it could be pure marketing genius, as the show will demand repeated viewings once the whole thing plays out, spurring DVD sales, etc...but I'll stay with it for a time, at least. Grade: Incomplete

Pooh's Theorem of "Lost"

The quality of an episode depends solely on the character contained in the flashbacks

Thus the best episodes concern Locke, Sawyer and Sayid (and perhaps Sun & Jin).

The worst: Michael, Jack, Boone/Shannon and Michael. I said that already? They're that bad, Will.

In that spirit, a few rounds of "Lost" inspired 'quien es mas macho':

1. Locke or Vic Mackey?
2. Kate or Elektra (or The Bride)? (XWLBill (because I have so many commenters, it's hard to keep them all straight. Or I'm just stupid. (And need to nest more parentheticals)) asks what about River Tam from Serenity. I think she probably takes all three, unarmed. Egregious oversight on my part.)
3. Sawyer or Mal?
4. Jack or 'Bambi'? (edit: the "Bambi" at issue is J.D. from "Scrubs", FYI
5. Mr. Eko or Jules Winnfield?
6. Sayid or Bond. James Bond (Connery edition)?

Update 2/17/06: Bill insinuates that I'm Hurly-hating. Not true. If I were to rank the remaining castaways in terms of episodice goodness, it would probably be thus:

1. Locke
2. Sayid
3. Sawyer
4. Sun/Jin
5. Kate
6. Hurly
7. Claire
8. Charlie
9. Jack
10. Michael

AFAIK, Hurly has only had two episodes, the first one was good, the second one, was a bit meh, even if it did have the kid from Road Trip. We haven't seen enough of the Tailaways to really know, though Eko is top 4, almost certainly. Ana Lucia, not so much.

Pooh's KwanzmakuhYear's Day Airing of Grievances

John Cole has the wonderful idea of getting everything off your chest now so you can start the new year fresh.

So, here goes.

1) Dubya. I could go of on a long-winded diatribe, but it's all been said. Often. Really, all I can add is "try harder".

2) Shills of all shape and size. Be yee Kos, PowerLine or just what Steve H. might call "PajoompaLoompas". I'll echo the "try harder" bit from above. Try harder to think for yourself. Try harder to think before you talk. Try harder to listen. Try harder to be as skeptical of things said by those you agree with as you are of those you don't. Accept being wrong. It happens to the rest of you from time to time...

3) Larry Luchinno. Jackass. You won, once, and are in full Huizenga scorched-earth mode now. Well done.

4) Sony and the RIAA. Putting the (my) "comp"(uter) in your incompetence. Whatever happened to 'you break it, you buy it?' And the RIAA, thanks for running creativity in main-stream music into the ground. I might just start having to listen to techno, just to hear some variety. Thanks for Ashleeeeeeeeeigh Simpson too.

5) Kaiser. You're a dumbass. (Edit: apparently people thought this was a bit strong. Fair enough. I accept your grievance that I am an asshole in my list of grievances. But since I've aired it now, I can let it go in one week and never grieve about it again.)

6) The producers of Lost. You have no idea where you are going and you are dragging me down with you. Stop it.

7) The Religious WrongRight. Practice what you preach. Or call on god to smite Dover, same thing right? And how was it that the gays and liberals caused 9/11Katrina again? Thanks for NutraScience^Tm as well. What do you mean some of the ingredients may rot my faculties and cause me to be outsourced?

8) Adam Morrison. Why oh why bring the sleaze-stache back? Other than that, keep doin' what you doin.

9) David Stern. Why institute a racist dress code and then let them wear pajamas on the court?

10) Blogging. Taking up all my time. At least when I was playing poker I was getting paid for it...

Quick Musings: In Which Pooh Links to Fox News with Approval. Twice.

• Fletch links to yet another post that shows that fanboi's (myself most definitely included) have thought much more about the Lost premise than have the show's creators. Professor Paul Horwitz decries the show's use of the "Idiot Plot". I think he's wrong in that since no one has actually shared any of the weird things that have happened to them individually, they can't really have a sense of the magnitude of the weirdness. Plus, Jack already thinks Locke is crazy, and Locke knowing this is unlikely to share the fact that his legs do not function in real life. (Not sayng that the island is purgatory. I would never suggest that. I think the whole thing being one of Walt's comic books, ala St. Elsewhere is more likely, but I digress.)

• At FoxNews, The Agitator, Radley Balko, takes on Congress for taking on sports: "McCain . . . says the federal government needs to regulate professional boxing because the sport is hopelessly corrupt. That may well be. But then, so is Congress." Ouch. My thoughts, more or less exactlty.

• The Sawx officially need a shortstop. Miguel Tejada, yasay? (For Manny? Not Sure I'd do it.) The MFY's have responded to the Bosmos and Mets moves by offering arbitration to Bernie Williams's corpse and reportedly signing the terrifying Mike Myers to a 2 year deal. The Geezeman agrees with Simmons about the Rocket.

• The Onion. Genius. A rift within U2? W. hearing voices? Tell me more!

• Positve FoxNews item #2: Israel provides an example? Discussing Sharon and Peres's formation of the centrist Kadima party perhaps "[i]ts impact may reverberate in unexpected ways across the ocean — Sharon’s action provides a powerful example of how centrist politics might evolve in the U.S. if the moderate majority in this country continues to be held hostage by professional partisans on the left and right."

• Matt Yglesias wonders why all the Yao bashing. Just compare him to Ewing. To my mind, the fact that the comparison is apt justifies any and all Yao-bashing, though Mama Yao's son will never be a HoF all-ugly team member.

• Normal service returning. In a completely fair and balanced manner, FoxNews assumes the conclusion: "PBS Continues Probe Into Biased Film". Though there is good reason to believe that like a stopped clock at noon, Fox is right on this one. Cathy Young explains.

• Dangers of following blind links. Definitely NSFW. Well depends on where you work. But absolutely terrifying. Josh, I nominate this for December.

LOOK OUT FOR THE SHARK...

I really can't say too much about tonight's Lost, except for its never a good sign when a character on death's door mumble/whispers "I love her" in the tease. Oh, and bullshit on Kate's backstory, she was so much more badass as a bankrobber.

update: and that's what I get for posting just before the episode ends...good cliffhanger, and I am mammothly enthused for the first Ekosode next week. A big Boom.

Update #2: NO NEW EPISODES TIL JAN?!?!? I hate network TV...

Thoughts From the Food Coma

So, after another year of the Thanksgiving two-step (another unintended consequence of no-fault divorce laws...), I'm sitting, whale-lake, on my big puffy recliner contemplating such things as how wonderful is iTunes. (Downloaded last night's Lost after the DVR mishap. It worked seamlessly, and the episode was spectacular. Of course, watching without commercials probably adds greatly to the experience...)

Coherent thought on more meaningful topics occasionally threaten to take shape, but nothing comes of it. And, concerning my general tendancy to overanalyze, is ok.

Back to Scrubs Season 2 on DVD. How come there are funny doctor comedies, but not so much with funny lawyer shows, despite the prevelance of lawyer jokes?

Do I really have to go to work tommorow?

MutherPlucker (or Defeated by the DVR)

So, back from the Great Alaska Shootout with Pops and the Blizzard, all ready to fire up tonight's heated episode of Lost...and my DVR didn't record. I guess they updated the software this week, and my season pass got zotzed. Or it just didn't work, since when I looked earlier, the red circle was present on the schedule. Now the question is, do I pay the $1.99 to download it when it becomes available on iTunes. Very disappointing.

In that spirit, Happy Thanksgiving, all...

The Other Side (Of the Island)

It's a good thing I have a DVR. Apparently its a bad idea to have your internet connection zotz while updating your blogger template. I barely finished reconstructing my lovingly maintained and vetted blogroll, when the Laker game switched off (no this is not my 5th sports post in a row, don't worry.) and...Freddie Prinze??? Oh that's the end of the show BEFORE Lost, but I'm here with Michelle Rodriguez. Nothing ever bad about that. Unless you are Maggie Grace and you got removed from the gravy train last week (or maybe you didn't. Is this all just an extended Boone hallucination? Don't push the button...)

Anyhoo, arresting right from the start this one was. It is clear that the original castaways had to be the focus of the show, mostly because they are more attractive as a rule than the "Tailaways", aside from the aforementioned Ana-Lucia (Rodiriguez), who's frankly to scary to have a crush on. Or not. Some are into the whole "spear me with a splintery stick" thing.

Goodwin, clearly an Other from the start (running from the jungle and all...no, WAIT A MINUTE, Jack got thrown into the jungle in the Pilot, so it could happen. Though the tail landed in the water and the body of the plane didn't. Hrm...) I must say his body was very well preserved for having been in the jungle for 20 or so days (or was it 15, 16, 23, 42...DON'T PUSH THE BUTTON damnit...)

Mr. Ecko is a bad, bad man. Is he from Nigeria? Is he a smack dealer? Will he and Charlie have some things to discuss? The little boy had a teddy bear, which got taken with him.

I'm actually a bit peeved at the show for one thing they reminded me of. When Sawyer and Michael wash up on the beach, and Jin runs up, they do the camera work on Mr. Ecko kicking ass the same way they shoot the actual others. Blatant cinematic cheating.

I Pick Good

Apparently, my probnostication skills are deteriorating. First, I pick the Sawx to beat the, well Sox. That worked out not well. Then I picked the 'stros to win in 5, which was close, in that they could have won all 4 games. But the real dooze was my logically based intuition that John Locke was not long for Lost.

Of course, Shannon's apparent death was clearly on the cards from the moment of the "what the hell are ballerinas doing in my flashback...oh Shannon had a job...wait this is Shannon's episode...D-E-D, ded" scene. Or it would have been to me, had I not watched in slightly inebriated condition.* Of course, there is no way Sawyer was dying because, well, they hinted that Sawyer would die. So naturally, he can't.

Wet-Walt showed up again, which is cool. Unfortunately, I can't play things backwards on my DVR to see what he was trying to say ("Don't push the button" is apparently what he said the first time he showed up...) [Update: according to EW Wet-Walt sayeth: 'they're coming and they're close.' Which in retrospect is true...]

Other then that, not really much to this one. Shannon just needed someone to believe in her, now she's dead. *Shrug* And we don't get to see the Hotness...er Kate** for at least two more weeks since next week is the "Re-Pilot" episode. Which actually might give us some useful information about the Others (and could, if poorly done, be the shark-jump moment...). Incidentally, the best use of Pilot Part Deux I can remember was in The Shield (Season 2, episode 9), which I love. (Glenn Close was awesome last season as the hard-ass captain...).

Blah....LOST!

*more thoughts on this later

** My mother is not the ideal audience for this show since she asks "How are her armpits always cleanly shaven." Just go with it...

4-8-15-16-23-42. (or Lost gets found)

Best episode of the season. And not really close. The weird-shit-on-screen factor certainly continued (though who doesn't want to see a Korean running through Other-infested jungle carrying a hockey stick for protection...on second thought, I guess its a boomerang fastened onto the end of a pole. I would have bought the stick though. Hockey is back, baby.

I always dig the Sun-Jin flashbacks, though the "It's my darkest hour...hey look, its Terry O'Quinn to offer pearls of wisdom" thing might get overplayed...you heard it here first, Locke is dead in three weeks. 3 reasons for my thinking: A) Big Scary African dude is going to be the new Island Dungeon Master. B) The annoying factor just mentioned. Has he helped everyone out yet? His work here is done. C) Was it me or did he have the "I'm still going to get paid for when I come back in flashbacks, right?" look when he delivered the eminently portentious line "I'm no longer LOST. Hey, this show is called Lost..did everybody get that or have TiVo to watch it again?"

Plus, it was reasonably obvious that funny-bald Hahvahd man (I wonder if saying "I went to school in Boston" means the same other places as it does here...should I start referring to Northfield as the Boston of the Midwest?) was gay married to some American chick, and that Sun buried her ring with the Message in a Bottle. Oh and she met Jin when she wasn't even looking for love...Next on ABCFamily, finding love without even looking.

Speaking of Love, we have a nice quadrangle shaping up, Sawyer/Jack/Kate/Girlfight Chick. (Unless Sawyer dies because Kate didn't get to say good bye. No, I'm sticking with my original pick...but you heard that here first also, just in case.)

No Boom before the ending "Lost" this time. Ruined my whole week.

Pooh's Tube

Mostly because I need a place holder for the index over yonder ------>

The non-sports TV shows I watch on the regular:

• The Wire: Gritty, dramatic, funny at times, well-acted, topical, massively quotable (when the new season starts, I might have to run an "Omar Line of the Week").

• Deadwood: See above, but replace "Omar" with "Swearengen".

• The West Wing: At this point, I'm just playing out the string, I've made it this far, I'm in til the bitter end, especially since rumor has it that Josh and Donna are gonna, you know, do it...

• The Shield: Hyperkenetic, largely amoral and perhaps immoral lead character, but he gets you to go with it. The fact that the series opens with a cold-blooded murder of a colleague by the protoganist, and you're still with him is unsettling.

• Lost: Definite growing pains in this, the second season.

• Daily Show/Colbert Report/Bill Maher.

Posts by Show

• Battlestar Galactica 2.0
  
• Boondocks, The
• Colbert Report, The:
• How Full of Crap is Colbert?
• Illinois Gov. not in on the Joke
• Colbert Goes to Whitehouse
• Cohen Doesn't Get Jokes - Still
  
• CSI, all 3.
• Deadwood
• Better than Rome
• Season 3 Last Season?
• Inside the Actors Studio:
• Dave Chappelle
• Lost:
• General Theorem of Lost Episodes
• What Kate Did
• Re-Pilot: Tailaways
• Lost & Found with Sun & Jin
• Real Time With Bill Maher
• Skewering Victor Davis Hanson
• Rome
• Shield, The
• Badass Vic Mackey
• Thief
  
• West Wing, The:
• Winding Down
• The Long Goodbye
  
• Putting an Old Dog Down
• Broken Wing - The Live Debate
• West Wing Juvenation?

Boom...LOST!

So, I think Lost is the best show on network TV since Sorkin left The Wing. But part of what made the show so appealing was the flashbacks, and so far this season, they've been slightly milquetoast (highlighted by the useless Michael flashback from the second episode). There is also a sinking suspicion that the creators are just mind-fucking us, that they don't really have a plan and are just throwing weird crap up there. Plus if one more person on any of those message boards says 'it's so obvious that they are all dead, and in purgatory'... (so what, Boone went to heaven because he stopped Crushing on his (half)sister? Good thing to know the bar is so low, though the Onion appears to disagree.)

Relatedly, I think Entertainment Weekly has the best Lost coverage, including TV Watch, sort of a bloggy comment on the show. Also, Stephen King tells it like it is to the show's creators.

Anyway, here's hoping they can strike the balance between keeping the show mysterious, while providing some answers...