But soon, such decisions will have to be made. Probably not by me, though. I mean, I'd hire me, but would you? (Don't answer, geeze, you aren't objective...) That being said, I'll almost certainly be working as a first year associate for some litigation firm, somewhere, doing, well associat-y things: Cite checks? Check. Document review? Yes, (and throw an extra shot into that Grande Pumpkin MochiFrappaCano, if you would). Discovery responses. Objection to form...
In all honesty, I'll a little wary of how 'life' will be in that venue. Thankfully, pseudonymous blogger Stanley Stankowski has some (I hope) exagerrated and (I'm sure) humorous tips and annectodotes for a newly minted associate. Favorites: Hypothetical interoffice memos to various firm archetypes. An excerpt:
Dear Really Short 6th Year Associate: I know that it sucks to be short. I mean, really, outside of the legal world, I am average at best. Of course, since I am in the legal world, and I am over 5'9 … I am a damn giant. I tower above everyone, be they male or female. Especially you. As noted, I am sympathetic. However, contrary to the old saying, when you ask me if I have finished that 20 page brief that you assigned me ten minutes ago, and I say (in my most nonchalant of voices) "Well, no," and then you yell at me and curse a lot, I am not really "being cut down to size." This is easily demonstrated when I stand up to follow you down the hall as you continue to yell. I am still much taller than you.
Also amusing, ruminations on the fallibility of spell-check, the pointlessness of most discovery-related litigation and, of course, the truism that lawyers are assholes.