The Rev. Pat Robertson said Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon is being punished by God for dividing the Land of Israel. Robertson, speaking on the “700 Club” on Thursday, suggested Sharon, who is currently in an induced coma, and former Israeli Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin, assassinated by an Israeli extremist in 1995, were being treated with enmity by God for dividing Israel. “He was dividing God’s land,” Robertson said. “And I would say, Woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course to appease the E.U., the United Nations or the United States of America. God says*, This land belongs to me. You better leave it alone.”See, the above five (and many more) aren't letting loose their inner jackass, they're just being themselves. Therefore, not eligible.
* God also says "Don't mess with Texas":
Me: Were you really supporting Texas last night?iGod and college football. Good times.
God: I was.
Me: You seem like more of a USC fan.
God: Interesting comparison, and probably true.
Me: I mean, the burnt orange just doesn't say God to me.
God: What is that?
Me: The University of Texas' school color.
God: Do you like your school?
Me: I'm going to ignore that.
God: Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me: Ignoring God? Probably not.
God: Do you still ? Why the uncertain tone?
Me: You're very wrathful.
God: You think I am wrathful.
Me: At least, you were in the old testament.
God: I was?