Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Asshole of the Week: Warm Suds Edition

Mmmm. Warm Beer. So says a Missouri state senator:
Under a bill by Sen. Bill Alter, grocery and convenience stores would risk losing their liquor licenses if they sold beer colder than 60 degrees. The intent is to cut down on drunken driving by making it less tempting to pop open a beer after leaving the store.
Well shit, why stop there? Force bars to serve it warm too. That way no one will ever drink. Just like prohibition. And as we know, Prohibition = Vegas. So that can't be bad...
"The only reason why beer would need to be cold is so that it can be consumed right away," Alter, who has been a police offer for more than 20 years, said Thursday.
Take away the "right away" and I agree completely with the above statement.

But the worst part is how he came up with the idea:
He said the idea came from a fifth-grade student in Jefferson County who was participating in a program to teach elementary students about state government. He sought their suggestions for new laws and chose the cold beer ban from a list of the top three ideas.
I could insert a joke about being governed by fifth graders, but after listening to Kennedy and Cormyn at the Alito confirmations, it hits a little to close to home.

Bonus recognition to the AP reporter who couldn't resist:
Some lawmakers and lobbyists, however, are lukewarm about the idea.
Somewhere, my dad is nodding his approval at that one.

4 comments:

Icepick said...

I don't know, Pooh. This guy sounds more like a dumbass than an asshole to me. But your mileage may vary!

mortnut said...

I gotta agree with Icepick on this one, and not just cause of the "bad pun" reference to yours truly. . . .Still thing your SLC buddy Miller who nixed Brobeck Mountain at the multiplex there ("can't have Donnie and Marie seeing such things . . . .) is more deserving (though, apparently, one would not be allowed to call him an ass hole in Utah!)

XWL said...

Good choice. Of course if you stick to politicians you will never run out of rectums to expose. (that doesn't quite sound right)

verification word:

oqrkzov

One of the more obscure villains from early Bond movies.

Icepick said...

XWL, I believe that was one of the Bulgarian henchmen in "From Russia With Love".